Sunday, 1 May 2011

ANTM All Stars!

For the past week every ANTM fans attention has been on ANTM allstars whether they like the idea or not, I will reserve judgement until I see the cast. Obviously ANTM allstars will be pandering to the viewing public who want a personality but I honestly wish they gather a top crop of HF girls for Franca Sozzani to take a second look at - obviously that ain't happening but I can wish! So who do you want to see in ANTM allstars? What would the criteria be? Would any of the girls want to even be on the show? Well I've looked at the past 15 cycles and the present cycle to knock up a list of who I want and who will probably be kicked into this orgy of bitch fights.

If all stars was a reputable cycle in terms of fashion then I'd like to see these 13 girls...

Ok all jokes aside if this cycle was truly about fashion I do not want to see any girl over 25. Whilst the bunch I picked aren't necessarily young none are over 25, I think. If you are over 25 and haven't found success no TV show will get you in the industry. Also I have not included any previous winners - sorry Dani and Nicole F. All stars should be about second chances and honestly to give a previous winner a second chance seems rather condescending. These 13 aren't my favourite girls ever but with all my criteria in consideration (under 25, did not win, actual potential, and girls I actually like) these 13 seemed the perfect group. Now lets introduce my all stars, from left to right.

Eugena Washington - Cycle 7 - Palmdale, California - 5'9.5''

I was never a fan of Eugena on Cycle 7 but her post show work shows a lot of potential. Now it's time to give Eugena a second chance to see how much she has improved since that scary thought of Cycle 7 - she sounds old to be in cycle 7 but in fact she's only about 25 I think.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - possibly

Erin Wagner - Cycle 13 Spring Grove, Illinois - 5'7''

Erin was a beautifully ethereal "taller" girl amongst Cycle 13's shorties. However if she makes Allstars she'll likely be the shortest at 5'7" but height shouldn't bar this girl from making the list as she is a natural model with piercing good looks. I love Erin and would love to see more of her bratiness.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - unlikely

Chantal Jones - Cycle 9 - Austin, Texas - 5'11"

I didn't appreciate Chantal's beauty as much as I should have on Cycle 9 but Chantal is gorgeous and it was a crime she lost to Saleisha, nearly as big a crime as Anya losing to Whitney but anyway please give me another chance to love Chantal because I really want to.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - nahhhhh

Aminat Ayinde - Cycle 12 Union, New Jersey - 6'1"

Aminat may have produced some dire photographs but Tyra knew what she was doing when she sent her all the way to Top 3 because Aminat has it. She has the body, the look and the walk to conquer modelling despite her weak photographs. Hopefully 2 years on she'll have improved in that department and grace us with the new Aminat.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - a good chance

Analeigh Tipton - Cycle 11 Sacramento, California - 5'9.5"

I LOVE ANALEIGH! She is 4th on my all time love list so I would love to see Analeigh grace ANTM again, she was absolutely robbed of a Top 2 spot on Cycle 11 so she should be given another chance - but I doubt Analeigh would accept even if she was invited because she's focusing on her acting career. Wait I just realised most of my girls made the Top 3/4 - only 3 didn't.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - doubt it.

Mikaela Schipani - Cycle 16 Boca Raton, Florida - 5'9"

MIKAELA, you are my 5th favourite all time and it was so painful to see you go so early on Cycle 16, Tyra needs to invite you to Allstars so you can show them how robbed you were. You'll be so perfect in Italian Vogue.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - No

Raina Hein - Cycle 14 Minnetonka, Minnesota - 5'10"

OML if wolf eyed Raina made the allstars edition I would faint! Everything about Raina is adorable from her catchphrase to her bushy brows even to where she lives. Raina is my No.2 favourite of all time, J'adore Mikaela and Raina being in the same cycle - FIERCE!

Will she be in Cycle 17 - hmmm....

Jane Randall - Cycle 15 Baltimore, Maryland - 5'9"

My love for Jane has grown more and more, it was very interesting when she was eliminated because Tyra honestly sounded like she had a tough time between sending her or Chelsey through to the Top 2 - Chelsey was consistent but Jane had huge potential. Anyway I'd love to see Jane in Allstars.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - I will eat **** if she is on Allstars, she's so above ANTM now but it'd be lovely to see her on the TV screen.

Allison Harvard - Cycle 12 New Orleans, Louisiana - 5'10"

OMG if Raina and Allison were in the same cycle, all the crazy things that could happen. Or maybe Allison + Tatianna Kern considering both have an obsession with blood :S Anyway Allison is gorge and so unique that even Tyra would consider her if only she was still modelling.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - very very very unlikely

Fatima SiadCycle 10 Boston, Massachusetts - 5'9.5"

Fatima! Fatima! Fatima! how I miss you and your Visa problems. Fatima has been doing reasonably well outside ANTM but another boost wouldn't do her any harm. She went on Modelville as well so there's a very high chance of her being invited for Allstars. Anyway I love Fatima - in my Top 10 ever.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - I won't b surprised.

Jenah Doucette - Cycle 9 - Farmington, Connecticut - 5'10"

Jenah's attitude problem got her in deep water in Cycle 9 but she's grown up now and no such problems should occur - I hope. I would love to see more of her and she has those lovely features. However I think she has stopped modelling, correct me if I'm wrong.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - so unlikely that if she appears on Allstars I'd probably stab myself to see if I was dreaming.

Kendal Brown - Cycle 15 - Northport, Alabama - 5'11"

Kendal the colt, I think that was what Tyra called her. She was just gorgeous, she didn't need to do anything and she would look like a model, just seeing glimpses of her doing nothing on ANTM was enough to make me mesmerised, I sound creepy now! Anyway Kendal needs to be invited, she is the best undiscovered model from the past few cycles.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - I highly doubt it.

Felicia Provost - Cycle 8 Houston, Texas - 5'8"

Felicia was cut because she looked like Tyra, well obviously she was gorgeous! Just kidding. But I really wanted to see more of Felicia. I still don't think her shot warranted elimination, to be honest she was one of the better girls in Cycle 8's craziness.

Will she be in Cycle 17 - erm, why would she be?

Others I considered were Nicole (C16), Simone and Jessica (C15), Brittany and Jennifer (C14), Fo (C12), Katarzyna and Anya (C10), Lisa (C9) and Anchal (C7).

BUT if ANTM Allstars was about being drama I would love to see these 13. All my previous criteria is thrown out of the window, no age limit, no credibility, anything goes!

ANTM Crazy 1 - Jaclyn Poole (Cycle 16)
ANTM Crazy 2 - Alexandria Everett (Cycle 16)
ANTM Crazy 3 - Anamaria Mirdita (Cycle 15)
ANTM Crazy 4 - Alasia Ballard (Cycle 14)
ANTM Crazy 5 - Angelea Preston (Cycle 14)
ANTM Crazy 6 - Sundai Love (Cycle 13)
ANTM Crazy 7 - Sandra Nyanchoka (Cycle 12)
ANTM Crazy 8 - Elina Ivanova (Cycle 11)
ANTM Crazy 9 - Renee Alway (Cycle 8)
ANTM Crazy 10 - Jade Cole (Cycle 6)
ANTM Crazy 11 - Lisa D'Amato (Cycle 5)
ANTM Crazy 12 - Brittany Brower (Cycle 4)
ANTM Crazy 13 - Amanda Swafford (Cycle 3)

Let me explain my Crazy 13. You can't just have big personalities in the house, you need a few nice girls in the house to contrast the bitches with so what better than to have toothache sweet Jaclyn in the house to calm the girls down. It'd also be very amusing to see which sides she takes and how she keeps a potty mouth jar for some of the girls I picked. OMG I'd feel so sorry for her if she was in that house with Jade and Sandra!

Every fight needs a fire starter and Alexandria will be perfect for that, if she could make Brittani and Molly go batshit over her wonder how much she'll piss off Angelea "the queen of real" and Elina! Thinking about it makes me salivate.

Anamaria was eliminated for being stick thin so maybe if she piled on a few pounds she'd be invited, then we'll see her lose it all again whilst in the house and all the other girls will bitch about her being anorexic and then Tyra would scream at her again for tarnishing her program as being inspirational to young girls...

I loved Alasia she was beautiful but so misunderstood. Well it'd be interesting to see how this misunderstood girl copes with even bigger personalities than Angelea such as Sandra, Elina, Jade and Lisa. Bitch fights galore.

Angelea's bitch please attitude needs to grace our TV screens again, she is absolutely perfect for Allstars but I really do not hope she wins, if she does I will be so annoyed. Anyway I wonder how she fares with the others on my list.

Sundai is in simply because of her height, it'd be pretty amusing seeing her dwarfed by all the other girls (I sound so harsh). But then when the other girls tease her for being short she'd kick the batshit out of them and show them that she's taller than all the other girls.

Sandra: "ey gurl are you plus sized?" That's enough motivation for a bitchfight from Anamaria!

I'd love to see Elina fight with "bitches" like Sandra and Angelea, that would be one good show. It's great because Elina can switch between nice girl to bitch so she'll be a good link to the non bitches. And also her general "I'm better than you" vibe will surely make for interesting conversations with Angelea.

Renee's breakdown on Modelville is enough for me to warrant her a spot on the Crazy 13. She'll seem fine throughout the cycle but when she's eliminated she'll burst out even more and beg Tyra to save her $11 ass.

Jade, how can anybody talk about drama without adding Jade Cole into the equation. She's the queen bee and will provide hundreds of hours of entertainment - she needs to be on Allstars - imagine how she'll be introduced... at 31 I'm still the undiscovered Supermodel! lol.

Lisa eatacookie D'amato, imagine how her outlandishness would grate against Jade, Renee and Elina.

Brittany will be an awesome queen bitch, and she's beautiful as well! I love Brittany but her personality suits my crazy 13 more than my wanted 13.

Finally Amanda Swafford simply because she's blind but would ass kick every other girl.

AND finally the 13 I think would have a chance to make it. They may not all make it but I think these 13 will be considered or invited, you may say this is my prediction list if you want.

Renee AlwayCycle 8

She was asked to do Modelville, she lost but go a consolation prize, I think she'll likely be considered for Allstars and it's even more likely she'll accept. She was memorable enough to be considered and also desperate enough to accept. She's on my Crazy 13 already so it'd be great!

Angelea Preston - Cycle 14

I hear news that she's game. She was definitely a personality and Tyra liked her so I think Angelea will very likely be in Allstars.

Liz Williams - Cycle 15

Something just makes me think Liz when I consider the actual 13.

Sheena Sakai - Cycle 11

I think it's a known secret that she's in Allstars, though I could be totally wrong and have to eat my own words.

Toccara Jones - Cycle 3

She was named this cycle, how many girls that far back get named? I think they'll ask her, whether she'll accept is another thing.

Alasia Ballard - Cycle 14

Cycle 14 was just crazily bitchy but without Alasia a lot of that would have been missed.

Jade Cole - Cycle 6

As I have said Jade is the queen of ANTM drama.

Fatima Siad - Cycle 10

Modelville... that's basically why.

Aminat Ayinde - Cycle 12

She had the drama factor and Tyra loves her.

Joslyn Pennywell - Cycle 11

I don't know if they'll invite her but if they do you'll see Joslyn on the next flight to New York.

Bianca GoldenCycle 9

Yet again Modelville, which means they're desperate and Tyra wants them.

Ondrei Edwards - Cycle 16

Just as an act of decency they might ask Ondrei to be in the next cycle, if she's interested of course.

Kayla Ferell - Cycle 15

ANTM is the only place Kayla can model and model she will.

Though writing this it seems very unlikely that ANTM will get 7 black girls and 3 black mixes for the cast as well as ghetto asian Sheena. That would totally overwhelm Renee and Kayla. Oh well only time will tell. See you for Cycle 17!


  1. If Allison Harvard is not a part of cycle 17, then I'm not watching. Erin Wagner would help though :)

  2. Whilst I've heard that some contestants are coming back just for the fun I kind of doubt either will come back :(

  3. The fact that the judges want to see Angelea bring out "hood" is absurd. It reminded me of the movie Hollywood Shuffle or Banboozled smh. It's sad when black women are being forced to look like Nene or Evelyn. Everybody's not into that lifestyle, and to most people, it's sickening, not an admirable quality at all.